an open mind

Describing myself in two words, I might choose the phrase 'open-minded'. This phrase does have positive connotations, but it can also be seen as a nice way of putting less attractive qualities which I possess For example: as an open-minded individual, I like to do everything. I may recognise that I am better in some things than others, but I really want to be able to do everything - perfectly. No, I'm not obsessedly ambitious, or a perfectionist. I'm open-minded.

However this quality of 'open-mindedness' means that there are some things which I am inherently bad at (something which I find hard to accept). One thing in particular which has struck me is that I am terrible at arguing. Give me a speech to write, a comparative essay, anything where I can discuss many different points and I'm fine. Make me read out said speech in front of 1000000 people and I'm fine. My conclusions are also fine, even though they're invariably filled with a thousand question marks. But sit me opposite someone and ask me to have a debate, and my heart starts beating way too fast and my voice gets shaky and I'll come out with the stupidest, perhaps even insulting responses you ever did hear.

I think it's something to do with being able to understand the other person's perspective. That's a nice way of putting it. Really, I just can't make my mind up. I could say that I'm just a good listener, but maybe I'm just not very good at pushing my own case and accepting someone else's is an easier option.

The truth is that it's always more pleasant to find a flattering synonym to any particular description. Instead of fat, we have voluptuous. An outfit isn't boring, it's classic. We don't call people short, they're petite. I can see this because I have an open mind and can see both sides of a word. Please don't argue with me.