Monday, 15 December 2008

an open mind

Describing myself in two words, I might choose the phrase 'open-minded'. This phrase does have positive connotations, but it can also be seen as a nice way of putting less attractive qualities which I possess For example: as an open-minded individual, I like to do everything. I may recognise that I am better in some things than others, but I really want to be able to do everything - perfectly. No, I'm not obsessedly ambitious, or a perfectionist. I'm open-minded.

However this quality of 'open-mindedness' means that there are some things which I am inherently bad at (something which I find hard to accept). One thing in particular which has struck me is that I am terrible at arguing. Give me a speech to write, a comparative essay, anything where I can discuss many different points and I'm fine. Make me read out said speech in front of 1000000 people and I'm fine. My conclusions are also fine, even though they're invariably filled with a thousand question marks. But sit me opposite someone and ask me to have a debate, and my heart starts beating way too fast and my voice gets shaky and I'll come out with the stupidest, perhaps even insulting responses you ever did hear.

I think it's something to do with being able to understand the other person's perspective. That's a nice way of putting it. Really, I just can't make my mind up. I could say that I'm just a good listener, but maybe I'm just not very good at pushing my own case and accepting someone else's is an easier option.

The truth is that it's always more pleasant to find a flattering synonym to any particular description. Instead of fat, we have voluptuous. An outfit isn't boring, it's classic. We don't call people short, they're petite. I can see this because I have an open mind and can see both sides of a word. Please don't argue with me.


  1. Hey, I think it's great to be open minded! Like you said, you take time to understand others' perspectives.

    I'm terrible at arguing, but what I've realized is that you can be a great arguer or debater, but not necesarily have strong opinions. Some people do, but a lot of people just know how to fake it and are just as confused as you or me!

    Own your open mindedness and view it as a seriously positive attribute :)

  2. I think we all should have a point of view with an open mind. I think it's a quality.
    Enjoy it.


  3. I'm the same way: I can give a speech to thousands, but can't do one-on-one debates. Unlike you, though, I just freeze up. You're a better woman for being stymied by seeing your opponent's perspective!

  4. I am a lover not a fighter. I have a few friends who are always wanting to get in debates and I go all Taoist on them and I get out of the argument and just let them argue all on there own.
    I will most certainly not argue with you.:-)

  5. I love your way of describing the use of flattering synonyms.

  6. I'm so pleased that you (sal, brooke, la belette) all share this 'attribute' with me! I am in good company :)

    And thanks to enc and seeker too xx